The Week of August 15th, 2021
“Why People Don’t Like Change” sermon series
Sermon Noodles on “The Loyal Soldier”
Sermon noodles for the week of August 15th, 2021 “The Loyal Soldier”
We are in a series of sermons on “change” and looking at the “True Self” and “False Self” of Ephesians 4:22-24. Using Bill Plotkin’s nature-based map of the human psyche to describe the territory of the True and False Self, we are exploring the spiritual growth and the lack thereof through the archetypes of The Nurturing Generative Adult (North), The Wild Indigenous One (South), The Innocent/Sage (East), and The Muse (West).
Each facet/archetype of the True Self has a counterpart or (to use a psychological term) “subpersonality.” Subpersonalities are childhood survival strategies that emerge in each and every one of us beginning around three or four years old. They are not bad or evil, in fact they are good in the sense they help us survive the traumas of childhood. But these strategies are fragments of the True Self and therefore are manifestations of “the false self” in that they do not flow from the wholeness of who we are as created in the image of God.
The counterpart in the “North” facet of “The Nurturing Generative Adult” is The Loyal Soldier. Loyal Soldiers resist change for fear abandonment and additional woundings. They keep us safe by keeping us “small.” Our Loyal Soldiers tell us to stay in our fox hole, avoid risk, don’t color outside the lines. Famous phrases include, “We’ve never done it that way before.”
Forms of The Loyal Soldier include:
Rescuers: specialize in appearing useful but also take power over people. Rescuers can also codependent and excel at caretaking instead of caregiving.
Inner Critics: appear as social-fault-finders, people who blame others, or the inner voice that constantly reminds you of how stupid you are, how you will never measure up, and that no one cares. (Golf)
Lion Tamers: to keep us safe, Loyal Soldiers can show up as people (including teachers and pastors) who see themselves as agents of our domestication. Lion Tamers consistently rail against innocent exuberance, uninhibited emotionality, instinctive sensuousness and sensitivity, and the natural desire to be loved and to take the world in our arms (Wild Mind, 132)
The Elder Brother: the great biblical example of The Loyal Soldier
In the scriptures a great portrait painted of the Loyal Soldier is in the parable of the prodigal son. Notice the elder brother. What is his response when his younger brother comes home after wasting his inheritance? Not that the elder brother doesn’t have a point and is probably right. His brother made terrible decisions. He has never done anything wrong. He has been the good oldest sibling. Responsible. Upright. Trustworthy. Carries out instructions to the letter. AND really struggles with giving grace to other people. This Loyal Soldier in the form of the elder brother has no joy, no juice, finds it difficult if not impossible to celebrate others good fortune and is stuck in the “poor me” syndrome. “I never get a party!”
He may also be secretly jealous his younger brother had the gumption to leave home. Something he never did, regrets it every day of his life, and would deny that fact until his dying day.
Three things about The Loyal soldier
1. Is the war for childhood survival over? If it isn’t you still need your Loyal Soldier to keep you safe.
2. The Loyal Soldier is not evil. He or She is a childhood survival strategy. The problem comes when we are no longer children and still employ the strategy to secure our safety. A key to positive change is to recognize the voice of The Loyal Soldier when they are triggered and try to hijack you.
3. Don’t confuse false self of The Loyal Soldier for true self. This is a major challenge because as we get older and still use The Loyal Soldier we begin to think the false self of the loyal Soldier is the True self of the Nurturing Adult.
Especially in the church, we begin to think the path of The Loyal Soldier is the path of true discipleship and it just aint’ so. The Loyal Soldier is where church strategic plans go to die. Unless a significant amount of healing takes place, the legion of loyal soldiers in the church we sabotage the plan. I have seen it time after time.
*This week’s sermon noodles contains the accompanying devotional guide.